Thursday, April 24, 2008

Save Money, Vote for Hillary

I, along with apparently Nancy Franklin at The New Yorker, often imagine how much better Hillary Clinton would be performing as a candidate if only she would hire me as her personal adviser/voice of reason from the Heartland.

While her campaign has yet to come calling--although they do keep in touch fairly frequently via email--I'm going to offer up the following slogan gratis: "Save Money, Vote for Hillary."

You see, Congress once again failed to pass "equal pay for equal work" legislation. Which means that if we hire Hillary for president, we can pay her less than Obama or McCain. Sweet deal! Given the current state of our national debt, we need to start pinching pennies wherever possible.

As a side note to all those twenty-something girls who've opted to support Barack Obama over Hillary because, you know, we've already totally reached gender equality in this country, I can only say, um...yeah.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Chris Matthews Is Rooting for Barack Obama

Think the media bias against Hillary Clinton is a figment of the candidate's imagination? Think again.

On the eve of the crucial Pennsylvania primary, Chris Matthews, host of MSNBC's "Hardball," called Hillary a pandering liar. Well, not in so many words. But during the course of an interview with Illinois Rep. Jan Schakowsky (co-chair of Barack's national campaign), Matthews questioned whether Hillary could carry Illinois in the general election without Obama on her ticket as Veep. "Of course she would," Schakowsky replied, noting that Clinton is from Illinois. "I thought she was from Scranton," Matthews sarcastically retorted. "Or Chappaqua. I can't keep track." Implication: Hillary Clinton is conveniently twisting the truth in her greedy grab for votes.

Really, Chris, you can't keep track. Of where a candidate grew up, where they currently reside, and where their grandparents lived? You haven't done the research?

Because I know that Chris knows that Barack claims as his "home" states Illinois (where he currently resides), Hawaii (where he grew up) and Kansas (where his grandparents lived, or his mother was born. I'm not sure. But then, I'm not Chris Matthews.). Oh, and let's not forget the entire continent of Africa.

None of which Matthews mentioned in his broadcast. Which some might call "obscuring the facts."